13 years ago today (10/08/21) my father passed away. He was a giant of a man who had a huge influence on my life.
His loss was immense as we as a family had always been so very close.
A strong, physical and powerful presence only matched by his love for his family. A beautiful man, a wonderful teacher, a glorious soul.
As we attempted to heal ourselves from this challenging period. Though we understood there were 5 or 7 stages of the grieving process and whilst I spoke of them often and understood the process, they certainly were not always as obvious as the books and internet suggest.
Thankfully back then, I also had my meditation practise. Though new to me at the time, offered a transcendent quality complimenting the support that I was receiving from the books and from those around me.
It quite naturally expanded my awareness and in doing tapped into my true healing potential. So the pain, whilst there (and should be for we should never suppress) was less dominant giving me space to just be!
Ofcourse life continued, the first few months, years even, had difficult and uncomfortable moments, as I found myself being triggered. It wasn’t so much the big occasions such as Birthday’s or Christmas’s. Those we could prepare for. But a song or a meal he was fond of was far more challenging.
At the same time I strangely found myself more capable in dealing with them as I felt support far greater than my body was usually aware and with that I gained great strength!
A strength that has grown each and every day since and as it evolves I realise his impact on me even now. For my drive, my passion and desire to succeed whilst maybe expressed differently to him is very much influenced by him and for that I will always be grateful. I love you Dad!